Warna Hidup

Hidup punya warna, biar pudar jangan gelita,

Di atas jalan hidup, 

Jangan malu hidup berhenti bertanya

Jangan segan menghulur tangan

Lampu-lampu harapan memerangi kegagalan,

lalu bercambah impian, bertambah iman,

menjadi akar pohon hidup manusia.

Fever

Its my first week of a very short holidays. The first 2 days, i was down for stomachache and now i have a fever.

Originally, i plan to do photo editing and make a bookmark. Unfortunately, i cant do it until i fully recover.

However, tonight, despite my headache, i manage to capture and edit a photo of my cat, Mao.

I love her so much. If you look at her face, she seems distant and arrogant but actually she such a cute cat. I never have a cat that so obidient like her. She will come whenever i call her, she will accompany when i stay up late watching tv and always cone to bed with me.

She is not a very tame cat and everytime i try to lock her up, she will get away. As a cat, she is a very skillful rat catcher and lizard killer.

When we were playing, i did get injured sometimes but i dont mind at all because for me a cat should behave as one. Im not someone who will bath their cat, trim its nail and make it wear clothes or bow.

I name her Mao because she likes to 'meow'. This is a picture of her. My cat, my friend, my loyal companion.

Kini Aku Mengerti Hatimu. Maaf

Recently, i watch LOVERS because its a good drama and i want to enjoy it. I did enjoy it but it also make me thinking.

Orang kata, perempuan ni emotional, mudah sgt terasa hati. Indeed. That makes man and woman different. Besides, that emotion make man attract to women

Tapi macam mana kalau terlebih emosi? Dalam cerita itu, heroin kedua selalu menangis depan hero sebab hero selalu sakitkan hati dia dan sebab hidup dia sangat kasihan. Tapi lepas seketika, rasa macam melampau lah pula, kesian hero tak faham dengan apa yang berlaku. Hero cuba buat heroin kedua tu gembira tapi perempuan tu asyik menangis.

In life, crying too much is not good. I dont like it. Its true tears are woman's weapon but we have to use it wisely. The weapon will turn into a burden if its too much.

It makes me think, why we keep blaming people for our suffering, why not just swallow its all and smile? Bukan senang tapi bukan mustahil.

Why dont try being tolerate. Try to understand others then we can gain peace.

Aku pernah buat silap dalam menterjemah hati manusia.
Aku biarkan dia tanggung semua kesalahan.
Sedangkan salah itu atas aku.
Tetap berdegil, aku lemparkan soalan
Terlalu susah kah untuk peduli
Tapi sebenarnya aku yang tidak
Memperduli kata hatinya
Aku salahkan lagi, tidak kah kau mengerti susahku ini
Tapi aku yang tidak tahu susahnya dia
Menurut kemahuan seseorang yang asyik meminta
Tetapi tidak pernah memberi.
Maafkan aku.

Wisdom comes the hard away

Last year many of my friends graduated and this year too. Well, its a lie if I said I dont feel jealous because I am! there is time that I want to close all the doors so I wont hear any of that news again, but I didnt. Why? because I proud of myself

Its true, I make a grand plan for my future before, and things turn not exactly how I want it to be. I fell pretty hard and its so hard to stand up again,  but I did it. Its not easy and I'm not all strong. but still I'm proud of myself.

You know, no matter how perfect your plan is, always prepare to fail. I'm not saying that we should choose to fail but being prepared is important. Its true, we should burn the bridges down in order to succeed but if you fail, what should you do then? Crying your heart out at the bank while hoping some prince charming help you? Reality is not that sweet, dear. At the end, all you have is yourself.

You have to wake up, stand up and find a way to move on. Maybe, you can search for another path or build a small plane to cross the river, or swim to the other side. See, you have a lot choice, and if you make a wrong one, make another choice. Hope is always there as long as we breathe. Remember, there is many paths to get to our destination, so if you found out that the path you choose is a mistake, dont feel down, keep walking, who knows what will you find there.

Dont be afraid, dont be scare when you make a mistake. We are human, thats what we do. Make a mistake, get through it and hopefully one day we can laugh about it. Open your eyes to many possibilities, and open your heart to many pains. Through this painful moment, we can discover our true strength, we can clearly see between friends and foes, then maybe you can find your true love. Always open your heart.

We may wearing the same clothes, we may happen to choose the same path but there is no guarantee we will arrive at the same destination. Who knows what fate plan for us.

Extraordinary people dont give up. They never stop working, living their live until they died. Even after they died, their legacy will be carried by others. so thus their wisdom.

For my friends who still fighting for their degree or diploma, Ganbatte Kudasai! Work hard will be paid.There is time that you feel tired and want to give up but listen carefully to your heart, what exactly do you want in your life. If you cant find your answer, well, its a tough case.

For my friends who just graduated, or will be, congratulation! You deserve it! Enjoy that great moment and never stop working hard. And, yes, get yourself prepare for the next stage of your life. Maybe get yourself a book about build a career, coping with co-worker or dealing with scary boss. Nevertheless, never forget to look down when you way up, who knows one day you will tumble down. I'm not trying to scare you. What i'm trying to tell you is having a degree is not a guarantee that you are better than anybody else. Listen to what other people tell you even if they just a janitor. If you want a respect you have to earn it.

Its a journey that bring people together,

Its a journey that bring all the joys and pains

In this journey we found love and hatred

and in this journey I found you.

When you arrive to your destination

Please remember what we have been through

The smile and the tears that we share together

and the most important thing is

Please remember....me.

"I learned what optimism really is: it's knowing that the more painful the event, the more profound the lessons. There are so many lessons in this life we just dont want to learn. You just cant tell someone these things and expect him to become wise. Wisdom only comes the hard way." - Dan Baker, psychologist.

Journey to the edge of Melbourne

Yesterday, my friend read my blog and said that most of my posts have gloomy feeling in it. I cant be more agree. Before this, I usually write in here when i feel bad but not anymore. Nowadays, its more about sharing my passion, imagination and my own world. Lets be clear not all of my posts are about me and of coz not all about him.

Without further due, i want to share with you one happy story, a story of real me....

This is me, not really a looker but I always try to believe I am..hahahaha

This was taken at Melbourne Zoo during my first year in Monash. At that time I went out with my frens since our day in Uniten Bangi

This is either when we waiting for the tram or we got lost.

It was hot that day and drained our energy out..hehehe..sorry for his pose

This is at the japanese garden in the Melbourne zoo. Its small but really beautiful (consider I never went to Japan so..). That guy is my fren who doing bachelor of science. Smart guy but can be annoying some time..hahahaha..If he ever read this, Im sorry and congratulation for your engagement with Far. Why we took the picture together? well, actually, at the beginning I was alone but then he came to inter frame. Hahahaha

After that, we went to melbourne city and spent our evening along Yarra River, my favorite place in the city.

And this is my fren, Azizul. He is a very nice guy and gentle too. But somehow, he seems distant or maybe I'm the one that being distant? Anyway, I like being fren with him and hope someday we will meet again. Oh yes, the background of this picture is a beautiful bridge, connected flinder street station and Eureka tower.

Its a street monkey!!! I read it once in the comic and I cant believe i can finally see it with my own eye. That red-shirt guy really are AMAZING.

See!! He walks from end to end without falling!!sugoih~~

After that, we went up to Eureka tower to watch the sunset and experience the scary box of Eureka. You will get into this square room, then something is moving, then the whole room become seeing-through glass. You look at your feet and you see the ground and you are highhhhhh way up.

We dont have the picture in that box, but this is me at the top of the Eureka. I can see the whole melbourne city from up there and the feeling is just unspeakable.

Nevertheless, we got the souvenir and went home with a happy face and soaring feet. It was a great experience, a great day I spent with you guys, and I will always treasured this. I feel glad that this memory that we etched in all the photos are still with me even after 3 years. We definitely survived the edge of melbourne and despite we end up in different destination, what truly valuable is the Journey. Thank YOU

WE ALL SURVIVED THE EDGE

 

 

Perfect love is illusion

At first, I thought I was dreaming when you said you like me too...

 

It was so amazing, you and I together soaring the sky, reaching for eternity love

But then, everything break apart, shattered the love that we build together

And now, I realised perfect love is an illusion, love is gone when all the excitement gone

What left is a memory of you, me and our perfect love

 

Love is complicated.

"A soul mate is…someone whose way of viewing life is not necessarily the same as yours but complements yours, so that there is not a compromise, there is a complement." ~ Paul Robear.

As J reading this, she starts to regret leaving Y behind. Is that a mistake? If it is, can he forgives me and accept me back?

Or, did i already lost the love of my life?

J knows she have to get back to Y as soon as possible but she dont want to rush things. She is the one who ask this break. With that, she persever

Meanwhile, Y get himself busy even more and try to forget J. He still furious. He still cant understand why J leave him after all the effort he puts in to build a great life for her. He works hard every day.

Suddenly, J's smile come to his mind and how much he miss that smile. He miss her. Will she come back to me? He asks himself the question that only time can determine the answer.

Life is complicated. Sometimes, love doesnt mean,stay. And love not always letting go. Sometimes, we hold things too dearly that unintentionally, we break it and hurt our hand that hold.

Oh how love is complicated.

J and Y look through the window of their respective house. The view is not the same but their mind synchoranize against miles. 'i miss you', the words echo in their heart.

Kepada Hati Yang Mendengar.

So close to that dark room.
Sebuah bilik yang menyimpan segala kisah duka seorang insan,
 bilik yang melihat kejatuhannya dan di bilik itu air matanya tidak berhenti mengalir.

Bilik gelap itu mengundangnya kembali pada kemurungan dan kesakitan.
Kembali menjadi dia yg lemah.
Yang hanya menundukkan muka.
Di bilik itu, dia mahu menjerit meminta pertolongan tak tahan penderitaan yang dilalui.
Namun yang ada hanga kehampaan, kekosongan dan dirinya sendiri.

Ntah bagaimana suatu hri dia mengumpul kekuatan,
menyapu air matanya dan berjanji untuk tidak lagi menangis kerana dunia.
Lalu dikerah seluruh tenaga memulas tombol dan menarik pintu yang sangat berat itu.
Dia melangkah keluar dengan harapan mencari sinar itu sendiri.
Sudah puas dia menjerit, merayu, memohon pertolongan pada hati yang mendengar
Kini dia redha sendiri menghadapi dunia. Segenggam tabah menjadi sandaran.

Berbulan-bulan dia bertahan.
Segala rasa pedih, malu, bingung disingkir jauh kerana dia nekad untuk tidak kembali ke bilik gelap itu.
Tapi dunia terus berputar seiring waktu menduganya, menggodanya untuk kembali jatuh.
Dia terus bertahan memasak kaki ke bumi.

Kadang dia terasa ragu adakah dia akan kekal tabah.
Saat dunia kecilnya goyah kerana dugaan
perasaan takut mula menguasainya seperti bayang-bayang gelap yang mengejar.
Malam tadi dia bermimpi lagi, didekat hantu-hantu yang inginkan nyawanya.
Dia terjaga dalam gelisah seolah benar mimpi itu.

Dunianya yang goyah, bilik gelap yang berbisik, sampai bila dia mampu bertahan?
Dia terus menjerit mengharap ada hati yang mendengar.

Love is letting go. Love is being here

J: why you dont treat me like other people. Dont u care bout me?

Y: i care for you. What are you talking about.

J: when is the last time you ask me how i feel?

Y: i did ask you about your life, right?

J: thats not what i mean! Asking about life and asking about my feeling is not the same.

Y: what is it? Did i make you angry?

J: yes! You dont care bout me!

Y: i care bout you, i always think of you but you know i've been busy. I told you before.

J: but still, caring bout me wont hurt your precious time. Besides, in one day, can you spend just a moment for me.

Y: you asking too much. I thought u understand me. Let me build a great world for you, for us, will you?

J: you are my world. I need nothing.

Y: be real Dear. I know money cant buy happiness but money can buy many things that make u happy. I want to build a some security in our future.

J: i am being real! All those thing, wealth, and success mean nothing for me if there is no you. Cant you see how important of you being here with me? We have a different view of a good life.

Y: yes, but those different should not make us apart!

J: no. thats what make all the different. i'm sorry, lets take a break from each other. I need to think it through.

Y: what?! What for

J: ask yourself, will you stay by my side for the rest of your life? Will..

Y: of coz I will, you know that.

J: listen. Please. Will you stand by me, a person who always need your love and attention? Will you still be with a complicated me who always overthink and curious? Will you love me fullheartedly even at time i disregard you for such a small mistake? Will you be here for me when i'm scare and in doubt? I love you so much to the point that it hurts even seeing you turn your back on me. This sensitivity, im afraid, you cant tolerate.

Y: why cant i?

J: you too carefree. You dont know me very well and you always underestimate my love for you.

Y: i dont understand! I dont want to understand. Please dont go.

J: you know, if im really for you, even if we separated by miles, by time and space, we will find each other again...but if not, i believe you will find someone better.

Y: please, dont do this

J: i love you, Y. I will always love you. Goodbye.

As the door close, their hearts shattered. Will they find each other again?

For J, almost here is not the same as being here. All this time, she only ask of love. Nothing more but it seems its too much.

For Y, she is his future and build a great life with her is what he wants. However, he forgets one thing! She is in the present. While chasing for the future, he lose the present.

For them, love is life. Love is them. But will life bring them together again? Only God knows!

Ku tak upaya - karen kong

Kiranya kau tahu
Apa yang tersimpan di hati
Hanya tuhan yang mengerti
Betapaku kecewa

 Air mata ini
Adalah luahan duka
Tidak pernah kau mengesatnya
Sekalipun tangisan darah

Aku tak upaya
Ku tak berupaya
Meraih cintamu
Biarpunku serah segalanya

Aku tak upaya 

 Ku tak berupaya
Biar apapun yang kan terjadi
Menantimu …
Selamanya ...

Aku tak upaya
Ku tak berupaya
Hanya tuhan saja yang menduga
Aku redha ...
Tak berdaya ...

Painted the SKY

Today, after finish my Law paper (fuh.....), I play around with Photoscape given by my fren. Kumawo chingguya.. :))

So this is the result..hmmm..not really satisfied with result but its my first try so...ok lah~~

There is always hope if we still breathing

The many colours in sky, the many blessing in our life. 

Thank you Allah

Memory

As the memory fade away, i cant see your face
 but the feeling you gave me still linger.

Us, Sea, and everything in it.

We reach for the sky, for a beautiful dreams in life.
Will you catch me when I fall? or
will you fall together with me? 

Muadzam and food

Last week, my fren and i went to new restaurant in muadzam named RESTAURANT AZEA.

I try its Bihun sup and hazelnut coffee while others order asam boi putih ice, mee kungfu, lai chi kang etc.

Well the taste quite good but the price is........expensive. What attract us the most is the interior design whih give you feel like being in kopitiam. I like the modern design and the use of white tables and chairs.

The service is fast too. The waiter and waitress are friendly answering our question and many requestssss. Hahhaha ^.^

Anyway, the price is what make is hesitate to step in again. Well, we may come again but only in special occasion or if we have money.

We are all students and money is like gold to us or like oasis in the desert. Especially for me that do not get any education loan or sponsorship. Haih. ~.~"

But if you ever come to Muadzam Shah or we alway call it Muadzam Highland, tell me and maybe if its your lucky day, ill treat you dinner there. #.#

Burn the midnight oil

The title means staying up late. Eventhough we dont use oil but electricity to light up lamp, this sentences sounds better.

For this week, i slept around this time, 2.00 pm onwards. Yes, it makes me exhausted!

Its all because of the final exam which just around the corner. Oho. I freaking out!!!!!

My carry mark is not what i expected. Ottokei?!??

Daijoubu, i'll try my best nevertheless!! Because of trying my best, my body suffer but dont worry i'll make it up to my body someday. ><

anyway, i wish all my friends that going to sit for final examination, a merry chrismast...oppss...

I mean GOOD LUCK and no matter what just try your best and pray you get the best! Wan an!!!

Craft - bookmark

Isnt all this cute? Guess what it is...

BOOKMARK!!!

  A bookmark with an emotion icon. fit it with your mood or your book genre

 Simple but I like the pop-up shape. can also make it to love shape, or camera, or .....

Cute!!! monster, bunny, bear, cloudy and blacky( i dont know what it is.hehehe

If you like to read book, you definitely will feel intrigue to have a beautiful and cute bookmark. Well, I do!

However, I dont intend to buy it but do it myself. Firstly, because its cheap (most likely free if you recycle). Secondly, you can make it as your own. I mean, based on your own interest and personality.

As for me, I like vintage design and coffee, so I'll make it in a shape of coffee's cup with a vintage design. it sounds like a good idea. Might doing it after this.

I have to concentrate study for my final exam next week. So maybe during my 2 weeks (really short) semester break.

Coffee and Me

I love coffee! One day without coffee is nearly impossible and give me anxiety for a whole day.

My favorite coffee is MOCHA. Its not as bitter as latte but not so sweet either. I read on one blog that someone who drinks mocha is romantic. Really?hahaha

Coffee drinking personality - if you want to know more.

I also like old town White Coffee. Similar as mocha, its not so sweet and not so bitter.

2013

Its a NEW YEAR, 2013...Welcome!!

While others may write their resolution, I want to write few questions which i hope to have the answer by the end of 2013.

1. Will I find new love?

2. Will I forget him? 

3. Or will i still love him for 7 years?

4. Will i able to change and become more mature?

5. Will i make all this bad feeling away?

6. Will i find my way in this world?

7. and will I get close to my dream?

"I won't hold it back again, this passion inside I can't run from myself, there's nowhere to hide Your love I'll remember forever."-whitney houston, i have nothing

I want to open myself a bit more. Heartless me really have to go. This year, i want to be passionate in every part of my life and enjoy it to the fullest. There is nothing more to protect. I dont mind getting hurt. All i want is to live my life.

WHITNEY HOUSTON - I have nothing : JYJ version

 

Share my life,

take me for what I am 

'Cause I'll never change all my colors for you  

Take my love, I'll never ask for too much

  Just all that you are and everything that you do
I don't really need to look very much further

  I don't want to have to go where you don't follow  

I won't hold it back again, 

this passion inside I can't run from myself,

 there's nowhere to hide

Don't make me close one more door  

I don't wanna hurt anymore 

Stay in my arms if you dare 

Or must I imagine you there 

Don't walk away from me 

I have nothing, nothing, nothing

  If I don't have you, you, you, you, you

You see through, right to the heart of me

  You break down my walls with the strength of your love 

I never knew love like I've known it with you

  Will a memory survive, one I can hold on to

I don't really need to look very much further

  I don't want to have to go where you don't follow  

I won't hold it back again, 

this passion inside I can't run from myself,

 there's nowhere to hide  

Your love I'll remember forever

Hobby 1-edit picture

I have a loooooooooooot of hobby and this is one of it.

EDIT PICTURE

Blue agapanthus. Easily found in the street melbourne.

 

Roses before it beautifully bloom. Notice a sight of water in this picture.

this is taken at MARDI cameron highland. I love the colorful colors of flowers

its an ordinary flower but after edit the color...boom...the pink and yellow is striking

it looks so wild, isnt it?

this one is quite suprising for me. It turn out to look like a paint

same goes to this..

this flower is hang at the bridge. It may not seem so elegant like ladyshoe(a flower) but for i like this better. it looks humble