I'm afraid and I'm trying to ignore it..
I dont have the courage
I know I need help but I dont know where to get it..
I try to tell others bout what I feel but not at the full extent...
I really dont know what to do..
This fear start controlling my life...
What I really afraid of..I dont know
is that only electronic or actually the future?
If I cant conquer the basic electronic, my future will be doom because I'm an electrical engineering student
its ridiculous to be afraid of circuits and wires..i know thats not what i'm afraid of.
what I really fear?
Today I have a lab experiment, if I absence again like i did half of the time, I'll fail this subject.
FELDA will be furious.
I have to face all this, I know but i'm afraid
everytime I think or face anythg about electronic,
my hand shaking
my eyes teary
my face pale
my brain cant think anything
i feel helpless
i feel so afraid
like falling in a deep dark sea
Only I can overcome this but I need courage
A real courage, that I believe had leaving myself
I need someone to help me be strong again
strong enough to fight this fear
but everyone is too busy
mending their own business
of coz,for their own survival
we are indeed alone in this world
My sleep time is increase...
i know why
because i cant face the reality
i rather live in dream world
this stress make me hard to fall asleep
even harder to wake up.
I need help..I cant say it with my mouth,its difficult to express my feeling in front of others.
God, help me before this fear consume all of me and I have nothing to live on...
Human in Me
Monday, May 23, 2011
Under the shadow of the night
I found the human in me
An ordinary human
that question the meaning of life
the meaning of my own existence.
Do I like a wind? complete yet empty
Maybe a star, luminious just from a far.
I stand on my ground
I seek advice, only when I intent to abide
I seek truth, at time of courage
Do I resemble earth? or perhaps sand?
When there is no more hope
I wrapped by fear
Let I shed bloods, tears and sweat
than surrender to devil.
The human in me
lacerate my heart
As I live myself in ignorant
**This poem is a mess just like me.
I found the human in me
An ordinary human
that question the meaning of life
the meaning of my own existence.
Do I like a wind? complete yet empty
Maybe a star, luminious just from a far.
I stand on my ground
I seek advice, only when I intent to abide
I seek truth, at time of courage
Do I resemble earth? or perhaps sand?
When there is no more hope
I wrapped by fear
Let I shed bloods, tears and sweat
than surrender to devil.
The human in me
lacerate my heart
As I live myself in ignorant
**This poem is a mess just like me.
My Korean Idol
Monday, May 16, 2011
Korean wave had hit many countries. Boy/girl band or rather call idol grows like mushrooms after the rain. However, my favorite idol from many years ago until now will always be DBSK/TVXQ.
DBSK or in hangul Dong Bang Shin Ki made their debut on December 26, 2003 during a Boa and Britney Spears showcase, where they performed their debut single "Hug" and an acapella rendition of "O Holy Night" with BoA but thats not the first time I watch DBSK.
I start my korean wave when I was 14 years old and the big fan of Won Bin (merely because of his face at that time). Year later, I fall in love with Korean drama 'Lovers in Paris', the highest rating korean drama until now. Since then, I watch many korean drama and listen to many korean songs.
The first idol group I like is Super Junior but because of their inconsistency during live performance I stop listen to them. I prefer a singers that can sing better in live compare to studio version. DBSK is the answer of my yearning.
DBSK not only consist of 5 gorgeous guys. If you think handsome dude cant sing well, you should listen to DBSK songs. You will be impress!!Member of DBSK :
Yunho(leader), Jaejoong,YooChun, Junsu and Changmin. All of them have a different voices and you can distinct their voices without watching them perform.
Yunho is the base and he usually sing bottom part and rap. As a leader, Yunho is the representive of the group and many people said Yunho has the charisma as the leader and always protect his group member.
Jaejoong has a very great voice and you can see how much his voice grow after many years. Its hard to describe his voice but how I see it is, in ballad song, Jaejoong voice can melt your heart. its so smooth and fascinating. When hit a high note, Jaejoong can go really high. He is a versatile singer, ballad or rock, he can deliver it really well only sometimes he need to control his voice. Having a beautiful yet manly face also smashing body, make Jaejoong full package singer.
Yoochun, I can say he had a very unique voice. At first, I dont think he can sing but then after listening more to his part, I think his voice very attractive. I really love him when he hit high note. His voice become husky and when he sings together with Jaejoong, their voice blend really well.
Junsu. Well, since the beginning Junsu really perform very well. His voice can go very low and very high. He can really control his voice and that make him a very good singer.
Changmin, the youngest but the most powerful especially when he hits high note. SM(their company) always give high part (or scream part) to Changmin and he never fail to deliver it. Sometimes I feel sorry to Changmin, he must feel tired. Eventhough his good at that part, he can sing really well and a great singer like other member. Changmin also has a model bodybuild. He is tall and charming.
Overall, DBSK is the best korean Idol I ever come across. Their harmony everytime they sing together is undeniable. You can see their energy in their dance, and sincerity in their singing. They deliver every sing full heartedly without thinking about their image and appearance.
The best Group ever, and my Favorite Group ever DBSK!!
***I never learn bout music or vocal, the comment is basedly on my feeling and thinking.
DBSK or in hangul Dong Bang Shin Ki made their debut on December 26, 2003 during a Boa and Britney Spears showcase, where they performed their debut single "Hug" and an acapella rendition of "O Holy Night" with BoA but thats not the first time I watch DBSK.
I start my korean wave when I was 14 years old and the big fan of Won Bin (merely because of his face at that time). Year later, I fall in love with Korean drama 'Lovers in Paris', the highest rating korean drama until now. Since then, I watch many korean drama and listen to many korean songs.
The first idol group I like is Super Junior but because of their inconsistency during live performance I stop listen to them. I prefer a singers that can sing better in live compare to studio version. DBSK is the answer of my yearning.
DBSK not only consist of 5 gorgeous guys. If you think handsome dude cant sing well, you should listen to DBSK songs. You will be impress!!Member of DBSK :
Yunho(leader), Jaejoong,YooChun, Junsu and Changmin. All of them have a different voices and you can distinct their voices without watching them perform.
Yunho is the base and he usually sing bottom part and rap. As a leader, Yunho is the representive of the group and many people said Yunho has the charisma as the leader and always protect his group member.
Jaejoong has a very great voice and you can see how much his voice grow after many years. Its hard to describe his voice but how I see it is, in ballad song, Jaejoong voice can melt your heart. its so smooth and fascinating. When hit a high note, Jaejoong can go really high. He is a versatile singer, ballad or rock, he can deliver it really well only sometimes he need to control his voice. Having a beautiful yet manly face also smashing body, make Jaejoong full package singer.
Yoochun, I can say he had a very unique voice. At first, I dont think he can sing but then after listening more to his part, I think his voice very attractive. I really love him when he hit high note. His voice become husky and when he sings together with Jaejoong, their voice blend really well.
Junsu. Well, since the beginning Junsu really perform very well. His voice can go very low and very high. He can really control his voice and that make him a very good singer.
Changmin, the youngest but the most powerful especially when he hits high note. SM(their company) always give high part (or scream part) to Changmin and he never fail to deliver it. Sometimes I feel sorry to Changmin, he must feel tired. Eventhough his good at that part, he can sing really well and a great singer like other member. Changmin also has a model bodybuild. He is tall and charming.
Overall, DBSK is the best korean Idol I ever come across. Their harmony everytime they sing together is undeniable. You can see their energy in their dance, and sincerity in their singing. They deliver every sing full heartedly without thinking about their image and appearance.
The best Group ever, and my Favorite Group ever DBSK!!
***I never learn bout music or vocal, the comment is basedly on my feeling and thinking.
My world
Saturday, May 14, 2011
i've been living this world according to myself. Regardless of others, i make my own decision.
When my little world tremble,there is no one to blame except myself, and it makes me feel so lonely.
Things getting difficult day by day. I wish I have someone to lean on....
When my little world tremble,there is no one to blame except myself, and it makes me feel so lonely.
Things getting difficult day by day. I wish I have someone to lean on....
Ridiculously romantic 2
Saturday, April 30, 2011
(Cont...)
The next film I watch is 'The Switch'. Its a very unique story of a typical theme. This film show about a neurotic guy which dont want to take any risk of telling his best-friend his love toward her. But, fates are not so cruel. One crazy idea if having a kid without make love or in other word have experimental kid and one drunk-then-accidentally-spill bring them together. 7 years past, and they meet again. The guy so drunk dont remember anything bout the sperm accident, the women clueless. However curiosity arised when they see how similar the kid to the guy, physically and mentally. and the similarities make guy and kid get close and bond a special relationship called father-son. As usual, it had a simple and happy ending.
Lastly, I want to talk about a film named 'Life as we know it'. The couple relationship start with hatred but a cute baby named sophie and a beautiful house bring them together. Sophie is their bestfriends daughter. When their bestfriends died in a car accident, they become sophie's caretaker. Like other magic story of a baby/kid bring couple together, its practically the same to this movie only that they have no blood bond with the baby. Its really typical but fun and sweet to watch not to mention how hot both the actor and the actress are.
After sometime, a romantic comedy film genre can be very predictable but i never tired of watching this cause its have different humor and always sweet.. :))
The next film I watch is 'The Switch'. Its a very unique story of a typical theme. This film show about a neurotic guy which dont want to take any risk of telling his best-friend his love toward her. But, fates are not so cruel. One crazy idea if having a kid without make love or in other word have experimental kid and one drunk-then-accidentally-spill bring them together. 7 years past, and they meet again. The guy so drunk dont remember anything bout the sperm accident, the women clueless. However curiosity arised when they see how similar the kid to the guy, physically and mentally. and the similarities make guy and kid get close and bond a special relationship called father-son. As usual, it had a simple and happy ending.
Lastly, I want to talk about a film named 'Life as we know it'. The couple relationship start with hatred but a cute baby named sophie and a beautiful house bring them together. Sophie is their bestfriends daughter. When their bestfriends died in a car accident, they become sophie's caretaker. Like other magic story of a baby/kid bring couple together, its practically the same to this movie only that they have no blood bond with the baby. Its really typical but fun and sweet to watch not to mention how hot both the actor and the actress are.
After sometime, a romantic comedy film genre can be very predictable but i never tired of watching this cause its have different humor and always sweet.. :))
ridiculously romantic
firstly i'm not a romantic person, i had a problem in expressing my feeling and emotion but i really like to watch romantic comedy film. Why? because its fun and fun.
Recently i watch 'The Proposal'. A story of a tyrant female boss (margaret) that force her assistant (andrew) to marry her to settle visa problem. being threatened of losing his job, her assistant say yes. Unfortunately, her perfect plan went to trash as that guy family is what she miss all this time. She fall in love with the family and with andrew. as Andrew start to know her real self too, he start to love her. The ending as expected.A happy ending.
Then, i watch 'Definitely, maybe', again. I like this story cause of father-daughter relationship. its so sweet. my last post is based in this story. A men can met many girls in their life but usually only one can truly shaken their feeling. just like in this film, i dont want to be like his daughter's mother(sara), that come when he has no one else, being his last choice and he just go for it and after many years they get divorce, leaving this girl in pain forever. The one that he really love is his friend(april). They always argue in things and had different prospective but those differences bring them together after so many years apart.
I want to share another 2 film that i watch tonight but its already too late and i need to wake up early tomorrow.
~~Don't Be Afraid to Love. That's just your old inferior function trying to convince you that you're unloved and unloveable. It's not true. Just because you're not sure what to do with yourself doesn't mean that you can't learn! Go on... jump in. The water's warm.
Recently i watch 'The Proposal'. A story of a tyrant female boss (margaret) that force her assistant (andrew) to marry her to settle visa problem. being threatened of losing his job, her assistant say yes. Unfortunately, her perfect plan went to trash as that guy family is what she miss all this time. She fall in love with the family and with andrew. as Andrew start to know her real self too, he start to love her. The ending as expected.A happy ending.
Then, i watch 'Definitely, maybe', again. I like this story cause of father-daughter relationship. its so sweet. my last post is based in this story. A men can met many girls in their life but usually only one can truly shaken their feeling. just like in this film, i dont want to be like his daughter's mother(sara), that come when he has no one else, being his last choice and he just go for it and after many years they get divorce, leaving this girl in pain forever. The one that he really love is his friend(april). They always argue in things and had different prospective but those differences bring them together after so many years apart.
I want to share another 2 film that i watch tonight but its already too late and i need to wake up early tomorrow.
~~Don't Be Afraid to Love. That's just your old inferior function trying to convince you that you're unloved and unloveable. It's not true. Just because you're not sure what to do with yourself doesn't mean that you can't learn! Go on... jump in. The water's warm.
Dont want to be
Monday, April 25, 2011
I dont want to be someone last resort
or someone hobby
or someone test circuit
I wanna be someone exception
that will do everything just to make me his..
I wanna be someone Unintended
that against all his rule
I wanna be someone Last Dance
till the end of his life
To love and to be love
I put my trust in
destiny and hope
that God had written for me
amin...
or someone hobby
or someone test circuit
I wanna be someone exception
that will do everything just to make me his..
I wanna be someone Unintended
that against all his rule
I wanna be someone Last Dance
till the end of his life
To love and to be love
I put my trust in
destiny and hope
that God had written for me
amin...
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